Fall In Love With the Best Version of Yourself.

Personal development/self-growth requires working on yourself both inside and out.  I've invested years into elevating my mindset around topics like conquering fears, crushing my goals, creating abundance, etc.

I love working on my inner self!

But, when it comes to elevating my physical self, I notice some internal resistance.  I don't place a high priority on looking my best at all times.  The other day I had a conversation with a friend may have changed my mind forever.
During our chat, I shared my list of beauty related activities I wanted to complete before going on vacation.  Immediately she suggested that I get lash extensions.  She then proceeded to elaborate on all the benefits she experienced once lash extensions became a regular part of life. Although she tried to express how extensions minimized her daily makeup routine and saved her a bunch of time, I wasn't buying it.  

Not because I didn't believe her, but because I once had a negative experience with professionally installed lashes. 

 Actually, the experience wasn't negative but I interpreted it as such.

Let me explain.

Years ago, as I sat in a boring meeting at work, I noticed a couple of my peers looked different.  It took me a few moments but I eventually figured out that they suddenly had these long, natural looking lashes.  During our lunch break, I discreetly went over to them and asked if my suspicions about their lashes were correct.  They gladly talked about their new lashes and where they got them done.   I wanted to try something different so I took the plunge.

Individual lash extensions feel so natural that you forget about them.  I went on about my life as normal but I noticed something peculiar.  When people spoke to me, they seemed to hold a little more eye contact.  People also seemed to linger around longer.  Maybe it was all in my head but I felt like people were behaving differently because my lashes were lengthened.  Instead of being excited about the effect of my new lashes, I began to resent them.  Where was all this attention when my lashes were tiny and insignificant?

If you can't love me at my worst, you can't have me at my best. 

After sharing the story, my friend co-signed by telling me about the time she met a man while wearing a wavy-haired wig.  At one of their next rendezvous, she decided to show off her long, natural hair.  Much to her dismay, he treated her very differently. It wasn't long before they no longer maintained contact.  She, too, felt a certain level of resentment about how reactive people are to how she looked with one type of hair vs another.

Our appearance impacts the people we interact with and there's no denying it.

This is one of the limiting beliefs that have held me back from looking my very best every single day.  Most of you have experienced the power in presenting your best self.  I once visited an online forum where a bunch of ladies detailed their glow up experiences.  One woman decided to bow out of the group because she felt like she was drawing too much attention from people and it made her uncomfortable.

A lot of us become slightly uncomfortable when we come face to face with the effect we have on people when we present our best selves. Instead of leaning into it, we shy away from the newfound attention.

We have to get over it.  

When we operate below our potential, we limit certain people, experiences and possibilities from our lives.  Sometimes we're so used to a certain way of life. It's scary when things change.  Especially if the change happens quickly because of a small tweak in how we look.  Social media has made it apparently clear that how you present yourself can become a viable, lucrative asset.  Looks aren't everything,  being smart, funny, inspiring, compassionate....are also considered assets. But sometimes we focus on personality related assets while neglecting the power of our outward presentation. 

I'm very guilty of doing this.  

The next phase in my personal development journey involves making sure that I place my attention on how I look as part of my feel food routine.  After all, nothing makes you feel better than looking in the mirror and loving what you see.  It's an instant confidence boost that is unparalleled.  I want to become desensitized to the reactions of others simply because I decided to spend a few more minutes on my appearance.  I shouldn't flinch every time I receive an unexpected compliment from a stranger or if good things start happening because I'm giving off confident vibes.  Instead, I'll view it as a sign that I'm attracting at a higher level...which might be a precursor to more positive things to come. 

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  1. I absolutely love your blog. Whenever I see that you have posted I get so excited, haha!
    I totally agree with you on this. I notice a huge difference in how I'm approached and treated when I am looking different. I think this is both a positive and a negative as obviously I should invest time in looking my best, but also on the opposite I shouldn't have to obsess that if I let it slip that I'll be treated any different.
    Chloe X http://chloelxuise.com

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  2. this is me, hiding away from life.
    i need to start addressing my personal appearance, i actually feel guilty if im looking my best, dont know where this comes from. I think once i have my own personal space i will have the freedom to experiment and try new things. thank you for this piece

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