Most of us are probably compiling a list of habits that we failed to maintain in the present year. But, for every habit that still eludes us, there is resistance attached to it. Every single one. Trying to overcome resistance is possible but it takes willpower, focus, and consistency. The more you fail at establishing the new habit, the more you judge yourself as being incompetent. This ultimately pushes you further away from achieving what you first set out to do.
I'd like to play around with the idea of making resolutions that focus on doing more of what you gives you life. Filling your days and weeks with moments and experiences that bring you joy and align with the ideal version of your life.
The reason why we create resolutions in the first place is because we believe the new behaviors will create new outcomes in our lives. These new outcomes will bring us closer to our ideal vision. New Years Resolutions is all about doing more of what will bring about our ideal life. The easiest way to get to that outcome is to sprinkle our lives with people. experiences, and rituals that we absolutely love.
Let's talk examples.
It's been years since I've maintained the habit of going to the gym on a regular basis. Years ago, I was at the gym 4-6 days a week. Now, it's sporadic at best. I could make another resolution to try to go 3-5 times a week in the year to come. Maybe I'll go, maybe I'll fail at reaching this goal. But instead of making a bold declaration to raise my gym attendance, I'll focus on taking more of the long walks that I love so much. Walks in nature inspire me. And when I engage in them on a regular basis, they inspire me to increase my fitness levels through strength training. Next thing you know, I'm back in the gym.
Doing more of the things you love ensures that you take control of your life experience. Essentially, you are making a clear decision to actively live a life that you love. If your current life looks completely different than the one you desire, then do more of the things that will lead you to the life you love. Or the things that mimic the life you dream of.
Let's say you create a resolution to spend less money (save money). Instead of completely restricting yourself financially, you might take some time to analyze how you spent money in 2018. Chances are, you'll notice some spending habits that neither serve you or bring you joy. From there, you could make the decision to invest your income into another area of your life. We tend to spend money on the same types of expenses over and over again. Doing so keeps our lives stuck in a holding pattern. Each of us can spend our money differently in a way that brings us more joy. Once you've identified areas where your money can better serve you, it'll be a little easier to stop spending money mindlessly.
I used to be very infatuated with reaching clear, specific goals. But in doing so, I lost the ability to enjoy the wonderful moments reached because of my desire to hit the next goal. Now, I'm all about crafting a life that I'm absolutely in love with (moment by moment). Does that mean that everything has to be perfect?
No.
What I try to achieve is the ability to take deliberate steps that create the type of experience(s) I desire. Even if a goal is unmet, we can still experience a joyful life. A life we love. By making this a deliberate practice, we evoke the law of attraction in an effortless way. In doing so, we'll soon find our lives flooded with more of what we desire.
I should make the disclaimer that sometimes we think we enjoy something simply because it's a habit that we've repeated multiple times. One caveat that I'll include in the "do more of what you love" mantra is to make sure the activity, person, or experience is adding to your life (not taking away from it). I love crispy fries, but eating fries all day, every day will bring about undesirable outcomes. I like chillin' on the couch binge-watching my favorite shows. But too much of that means unwanted pounds and a diminished social life. The things we enjoy that don't contribute to the ultimate ideal version of our lives must be minimized or eliminated.
So, on this last day of the year, I encourage you to fantasize about what your life would look like if it were perfect. Then, start to identify the activities and experiences that will bring the vision into reality. From there, sprinkle elements of your vision into your day, your week, your life.
Make this your number one focus for the year ahead.
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